1st October, 2015

Thank God! Vodka And Water Are The Same Colour

I was at my cousin’s wedding when this happened. It was some pre-wedding function hosted by the groom's side and we were guests. So I was here surrounded by people who were time and time again pulling my cheeks and letting me know that I had grown up. And I had to smile back. Gosh, had it not been for Muzaffarpur-wali-chachi, I would have never moved on from watching cartoons, not knowing I had grown up. Relatives can be such a pain sometimes. The ordeal was almost drilling the last nail in my coffin when I saw her. She looked equally uninterested. I had never noticed this girl in any of the previous ceremonies, so I called up my newly made friend from the groom’s side to enquire. I was told she had only arrived that day and was a distant relative who had come with her mother. The mother was nowhere to be seen so I found a vacancy for myself in the scene. I walked up to her with a glass of coke to offer. The offer was turned down but my company was invited.  “It sucks here!” she said, “Let’s go somewhere else.” “I don’t know a place here, do you?” “On the other side of the road, you see? That’s another wedding and they have that section too where they’re serving better than your coke.” “What if someone finds out?” “I hope someone finds out”, she said. A few minutes later my mother finds me drunk as I fall off balance around her with a glass of vodka in my hand. A few more relatives gather and they try to create a scene. Then the girl comes around clapping as she tells everyone I was acting for her prank and the glass only had water. Everybody starts laughing, many even smell the glass but it was only water. Crowd disperses but my mother still annoyed, walks away. But wait, did anyone check the bottle I had in my hand? They missed the real deal. We did sneak the vodka into the party and even made some secret cocktails for the guests. Didn’t affect some of my relatives though, they are always as stupid as drunk!

by Divya

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